Psychotherapy and Aikido

As mentioned on my Bio page, I am a long-time student of Aikido, a Japanese martial art with a unique pacifist philosophy. There are many places to learn about Aikido, both online and in person, so I won’t attempt a crash course here. Instead, I want to highlight the surprising parallels between Aikido philosophy and the practice of psychotherapy. And in doing so, I hope to make a point or two about the kind of therapy I believe is most often helpful.

Simply put, Aikido is

A way of being:

centered, grounded, relaxed, and receptive

A way of connecting with another person:

welcoming, blending, and harmonizing — non-resistant, no “fight or flight”

A way of contributing:

adding to the improvisational nature of the exchange, in order to arrive at a peaceful, creative resolution of conflict

Traditional psychotherapy shares these qualities. Back in 1912, Sigmund Freud advised therapists to pay “evenly hovering attention” — that is, to listen to patients with a receptive open mind, and without biasing themselves by over-focusing on specific details, or on planned strategies. He began a long trend for psychotherapists to practice being (being calm, being good listeners, being thoughtful) more than doing (intervening, forcing change, etc). This was emphasized years later by humanistic therapists such as Carl Rogers, Gestalt therapists such as Fritz Perls, and others. The century-plus history of depth psychotherapy hinges on this non-directive approach, where patients and therapists discover new insights together.

In Aikido, the physical outcome is a product of the force and momentum of both parties. Likewise, in psychotherapy, the therapist does not change the patient in a subject-object fashion. Both contribute. As a result, creative, unexpected solutions can arise. Therapy is not limited to working doggedly toward predefined goals. Instead, it can include surprise and delight that arises from a kind of “flow state.”

I mention this to compare depth therapy, which I mainly practice, to symptomatic treatments such as psychiatric medications and CBT therapy. While the latter clearly have their place — they can relieve miserable symptoms — there is little opportunity for creative solutions or unexpected outcomes. These methods assume that one or both parties know, in advance, what the best outcome can be.

The truth is, life is more complicated than that. Forcing or imposing change from the outside, or even on oneself, can lead to backlash. The best solution to a problem usually results from taking all “sides” of a conflict or uncertainty into account, and discovering a way forward that encompasses or transcends the conflict.

That may sound esoteric, but it’s the way nature really works. Aikido is an effective martial art because it operates in accord with the natural world, not thanks to mystical theories. The same is true of depth psychotherapy. Many abstract concepts underlie both Aikido and psychotherapy, but the proof is in their results. Psychodynamic therapy, and depth psychotherapy more generally, has been proven effective in decades of research. It’s not a simple “do this, and get that result” kind of treatment, just as Aikido isn’t “block the punch, and punch back.” Both aspire to more, and they achieve it by harmonizing with people, and with the energy they bring to the encounter.